Last week I turned 35 years old.
Yup – 35 years of living!
And that made me think about what life has taught me so far and what I would have done differently.
And I want to share 5 things 35 years of living have taught me with you today hoping that you also stop for a second and think about how you are living your life and how you WANT to live your life.
Because it is all up to you!
1) I wish I had cared less about other peoples opinions
For many years I was a people pleaser.
I did everything I possibly could to make sure that everyone around me – liked me.
Even thought I knew that is was mission impossible I tried.
I bended over backwards not to offend anyone.
I bended over backwards to fit in.
I bended over backwards to please family, friends, clients etc.
I wasted tremendous amount of time worrying about what people thought of me.
And it as tiring – to say the least.
Even people I did not like – I pleased.
I guess I had learned from a very young age that if someone didn’t like me it was me that needed to change.
I was an expert at people pleasing.
But at some point I just got so fed up pleasing everyone around me that I decided enough was enough.
I kept telling to myself that “I don’t like everyone so why should everyone like me?”.
I decided that I would rather have few friends that loved me from the real me than trying to fit in and please all the time.
I decided that as long as I could look myself in the mirror and know that I was doing my best and that I was treating people like I wanted to be treated – it was more than enough.
Talk about feeling free.
2) I wished I would have been more present instead of living in the past or the future
When I was younger I was always thinking about the past.
What I could have done better.
What I should have said instead.
I was always living in the past.
When I was about 20 for some reason (maybe the loss of my mom) I started to live in the future.
Always thinking “when this happen – then I will be happy”.
Only to see that goal constantly moving further out in the future.
As soon as I accomplished a goal I had already moved on to the next one.
Leaving me feeling never happy.
This way of living actually kept me from living because I was not being present at all.
I was an overachiever with big O always reaching for the next big goal instead of actually celebrating what was right in front of me.
One of my big “I will be happy when this happens” was the belief that when I earned my first 1 million DKK I would be happy forever.
But when that happened and I was still not happy – I realized that I was playing a “dangerous game” actually missing out on the most important part of life – living in the now.
3) No matter what (shit) lifes throws at us we ALWAYS have the option to choose how we are going to respond and handle it
One thing I am super proud of is this way I handle things.
Even devastating fucked up things that makes me wanna cry for weeks.
When ever a situation like this has been “presented” in my life I have always seen it like a crossroad.
Accepting the situation and then telling myself “I have two options – I can either let this break me or let it make me stronger” and no matter how hard the situation has been I have chosen the last option.
We ALWAYS have an option to decide how we are going to react to things – even in the hardest situations.
It’s up to us!
4) Money, big cars and are nice to have – but it is not where happiness starts
I love money.
I love big cars.
I love nice bags, diamonds etc.
I really do.
And I think that it all makes life even more fun.
But to be honest I had a loooong period of my life where I thought that it would make me happy.
That it would fill up that empty feeling I had inside (of not being good enough).
And then I got the big car, the nice house, the sweet husband living in a great neighborhood – and I was still not really happy.
And that made me realized that happiness is an inside job.
Happiness is created on the inside and we have the option to choose to be happy no matter what we have or don’t have.
Our thoughts and our MindBration® is creating the outer reality – not the other way around.
When this really clicked everything in my life turned around.
I was more happy AND I actually started attracting more money and abundance.
5) We never know what is going on in peoples life and more compassion is needed
I see more and more love and compassion emerging in the world.
But I also see more and more people pushing through life (I have been there myself).
One thing I have learned from living 35 years is that we NEVER know what’s going on in other peoples lives.
We never know what fights they are fighting.
We never know if they just lost someone they loved.
Or if they are sick.
I think a really good thing would be if we all showed more compassion.
If we all remembered that we are all in this together.
It’s important that we remember that.
That we are all one.
A stranger might need a “can I help you?”, “are you okay?” or something like that.
It’s not hard to spread love.
It’s not hard to remind ourselves that we don’t know what is going on in other peoples life.
A “do you need help carrying your groceries?” goes a long way.
This is 5 things I have learned from living 35 years.
And I want to end by saying that I am not a person who really regrets anything because I always see it as learning.
But if there is something I would have to myself 10 years ago it is “you are more than good enough – I love you”.
Lots of love, Miella
Ps. If you are ready to step into the next level version of yourself, manifest what you are dreaming of and co-create some epic shit with the universe – grab one of my exclusive 1:1 mentorship spots here.